Wellbeing

So I met with a nurse from EHRC last Friday and she left me a pamphlet on biofeedback.  It sounds good but I don't think I am there yet.  I called her about it and some other questions on Wednesday and suggested I see my psychiatrist and pursue my planned EMDR (which has been put on hold until I see the psychiatrist needed to put me on disability). 

I suggested I wait until May to try biofeedback and I felt like she was pressuring me to change counsellors.  I have a counsellor at the Children's hospital and I love her I don't know why I need a new counsellor it would be like starting all over again.  She is also pushing really hard for me to leave my baby with her while I go to counselling.  I nicely said he is good he can just stay with me but she won't let it go.

I am trying to get my well being in order and I think I am on the right track.  I am losing weight, working on fitness, playing with my babe, starting monthly massages, going to the chiropractor, eating an ounce of dark chocolate a day, drinking green tean and YJ and now launching my own YJ business.  Isn't that enough?!

Revamping the diet

The soup diet isn't working for me.  I am losing weight but not fast enough and it leads to bindging when I do eat out.  I am craving eggs, pasta everything.  So here is my new plan.. water.. that has been my weakness I will finish the water jug daily even if it means chugging it at the end of the day.

So I will do a shake (carnation) since I have a bunch in my cupboard from before my husband passed away or a smoothie for breakfast.  For lunch I will do soup or salad making sure to practice portion control.. no more than a small soup bowl of food. Then a piece of fruit or cup of Zero yogurt if desired afterward.  Supper will be sensible.. no more than a small soup bowl of food but It will include meat or eggs and veggies and maybe even brown rice or whole wheat pasta.

I am also adding two squares of dark chocolate and one cup of green tea a day to my diet.  The dark chocolate is a nice treat and has some excellent health benefits especially with my weight induced health risks that it can help curb.  Green tea is supposed to have weight loss properties.

Confessions

I stepped on the scale this morning and I haven't lost a pound.  But, I know where I went wrong.  On day 3 I woke up at about 4 am hungry and ate a banana thinking it was day four.  but by day four I had lost 5 lbs.  It all went wrong New Years Eve.  I had a drink which we all know is a no no.  I had 2 carbonated drinks not even the diet ones.  I ate cheese and had a piece of cake and beef on a bun.  There were lots of veggies there and I could have had the beef without the bun.  Especially if I hadn't eaten my 3 portions of meat for the day before hand.

Portion control is definitely my weakness especially when it comes to sweets.  I noticed this yesterday when I made a single serving of brown rice, wow was that a small serving.  I would always make four to six servings when my husband was alive and truly that would be 2 or 3 servings for us.  In our house growing up if you didn't eat all you could the first night it would all be gone by the next day because my siblings would get up in the night and eat it all.

New Years day I ate as I should at the house.  But, it was my niece's 17th birthday and I went over for dinner.  The roast beef was healthy but not the scalloped potatoes and she had made a mixed veg mostly peas and corn.  The the cake, I should have just had one piece I told myself that but it was so good.  I knew I shouldn't do it but I did anyway.  Does that mean I am not comited to weight loss?

New year's eve and diets

Well, last night was a wash... I learned something valuable about my eating habits though.  I had only one drink at the party, as the diet says it is no condusive in alcohol consumption and I quickly felt the effects.  But, I had beef on a bun, so bread which is a no no and then I had some cheese, but the thing that taught me a lesson was the piece of cake I had.

The piece of cake was small but it had a coconut icing and I didn't love it.  But, did I stop eating?  No.  My sister had a slice and she said "I don't know that I am a fan.  I can honestly say I am done."  I need to learn that food that is not fully enjoyable does not need to be finished.

Diet Day 4

So far I have learned that keeping the house clean is essential to working out.  Just a part of having life in order and not having excuses.  I also have learned that now that I have scheduled and check listed my life I need to be more active.  So today we added in a routine at the house. Elliptical trainer and yoga workout.

Yesterday I did have a few fabulous smoothies simply made with 3/4 frozen fruit and then filled to the top with unsweetened fruit juice.  A nice treat.  Today I would kill for a slice of bread, a sandwich or a burger.  I am ready for beef tomorrow and have a steak thawing.  It may be for breakfast!